The Duck from Washington, D.C.,
a world-renowned celebrity,
was not a mallard, canvasback,
or green-winged teal.
No, Sam was hatched
a simple barnyard fowl,
all white, with yellow bill.

And yet this ordinary duck
had had a marvelous career.
Beginning at an eastern daily
as a lowly copy duck,
Sam Donal waddled
up the ranks, dabbling
in all kinds of muck.
His big break came the night
that he reported (live)
one thousand Russian tanks
were speeding down I-95.
This information did so terrify the nation
- and his tears of fright so charmed it -
overnight he was a hero.

So what if he was wrong in his reporting?
So what if those nocturnal streams
were only armored trucks transporting
foreign-made components
to a striking auto plant?
So what if Sam had later to recant?
From this one happy slip
his fame and name would come.

And what a name it was!By blind dumb luck,
just one week past
he'd changed his name
from Donal to McDonalduck,
a moniker more fit by far
for one become a superstar.

The offers that now came his way
were legion, and he grabbed
the best job in the region:
anchor Duck at CBA.
His yearly pay?
Eight million bucks.
Sam had become, in short,
the wealthiest of ducks.
Still, feeling he had more to say,
and having free time in the day,
he took a second job as
White House correspondent Duck
at half again the pay,
became a D.C. resident,
and soon was seen on every TV screen
quacking questions at the president.

Yet this assignment
taking him to outer space
was the greatest of Sam's long career,
and he gave it top priority.
For it would earn him seven million bucks,
and help advance the cause of ducks,
who still, in prime time news,
were a minority.

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